Sherry Hebert's "Art of Neighboring" Story
SPRINGFIELD, Mo. -- Nearly ten years ago, Springfield residents Sherry and Lynn Hebert read Dave Runyon's book, "The Art of Neighboring." The book was convicting and the impact of their efforts was immediate and caused them to develop a neighboring lifestyle that they maintain even today.
Sherry was kind enough to do a Question and Answer session to get at the heart of what being an engaged neighbor has met for her and her family.
Q: What does it mean to be an engaged neighbor?
A: It means being a part of their lives as long as they will allow. It means being aware of and caring about their needs and what they're going through. It means helping physically where you can and praying for them daily.
Q: Why do you think neighboring is important?
A: Because it's important to Jesus! He loves them and wants us to show His love to them. I believe our love and relationship with Jesus directly relate to how much and how well we love our neighbors. So, if we allow our relationship with Christ to wane, we may not want to be as loving or helpful to our neighbors. If our attitude toward them is "Neighhhhh....BOR-ing" (don't want nothing to do with them), we may want to check our attitude toward our Savior! I think the two go hand in hand.
Q: Why do you love connecting with your neighbors?
A: It gives us a sense of comfort and peace. We KNOW one another. We are THERE for each other. It builds a strong sense of community. We are aware of and careful over one another. We are FRIENDS and not just acquaintances.
Q: What challenges have you had in trying to "neighbor" around you?
A: It's EASY for me to welcome them to the neighborhood with a plate of cookies and an exchange of phone numbers, and "if you ever need anything" politeness. It's another thing to "linger long" with them and grow into a deeper relationship. That takes time, effort, and patience (these virtues only develop when we are close to and connected to Jesus). It's hard for me to "draw close" to individuals -- especially if I sense they don't want to be friends. I don't want to keep trying, but I've found there are still ways to show I care.
Q: What are some ways to show you care from a distance?
Text to let them know you're thinking of them and ask if there's anything you can do or pray for them. When going shopping, text or call to ask if there's anything you can pick up for them while you're out. Continue, intermittently, to let them know you're there for them. And realize that you haven't failed just because they don't want to be close or be friends of any kind. Your kindness may just be a "seed planted" or a "link in the chain of the long "neighboring" fence" that God will use to connect them to Him at a later time. Don't feel bad, and don't QUIT trying to be a good neighbor. God will work it for good!!
Q: What benefits have you seen from your neighboring efforts?
A: All of our neighbors know we are Christian and that we go to God in prayer! Even though we may not be close, they will stop us in the yard or call or text asking for prayer. At those times, I tell them of God's great love for them and how He can deliver them through their troubles. Then I keep up on them and see how things are going. I've invited several to church at different times, and two families have visited. Others can talk with us about spiritual things/difficulties because they know Lynn was a pastor, and they feel comfortable sharing. They still don't go to church, but we know God is using us to draw them to him.
Q: That is a great example. Have you discovered other benefits of neighboring too?
A: Yes. One benefit is that we know one another, feel safe, and watch out for one another. "Front yard living" helps create an atmosphere of Family-ing (we have a bench in the front yard, and we sit out there to create "opportunities" for our neighbors to drop by. It is much easier to drive into the garage and close the door, so this "front yard stuff" has to be intentional!
Q: What are some other ideas for neighboring that you have tried over the years?
A: Christmas bags to everyone on the block (filled with
homemade goodies) accompanied by a bit of caroling. Front-yard vacation Bible
school. Even though we've never had our neighbors over for a meal, I have invited several ladies for tea, snacks,
and intimate time, and they really loved it! I really think that is preferred.
We shoveled out others' driveways in winter and helped mow their yards in summer.
Not boasting here, just saying and praying all these things show God's love for
them and that they will see HIM more clearly.
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