Ideas for Men's Ministry in Neighborhoods

 

In most parts of the United States, the days of drawing men to a church for a special event or speaker have waned. Schedules are too busy. Many have resistance to coming to an event at a church. Women often set their husband's social schedules. And in some areas, you need a large budget to produce something that draws people in. 

It can also be a daunting task for a group of men to organize events. It is also vital to have an approach that is flexible depending on your number of volunteers, time and budget.

We are finding that in order to have a bigger impact, we have to think smaller. We have to think local. We have to think of neighborhoods. After all, it was Jesus who said the second half of the greatest commandment is to love our neighbors. But we have to know our neighbors' names and actually interact with them before we can love them!

In addition, research is showing that younger men do not want more speakers, more meetings or more events but they are excited about making a difference in someone's life. They are often willing to dive in and do some work if they believe there will be an impact.

So what does a men's ministry effort look like in a neighborhood? 

In Billy Bakers' book, "We Need to Hang Out: A Memoir of Making Friends," he writes about the challenges of getting men together. There is a resistance to overly planned events and suspicion about motives. Eventually, Billy began to organize something called "Secret Men's Night." He would post the time and place and you had to show up to discover the plan. The gatherings often involved service. It proved to be a great success. Could something similar work for men's ministry? How would that work? 

Remember the goal is to make positive contacts with neighbors to build relationships first. Those relationships could lead to participation in a life group or other church-related activities but that isn't the goal of this initial contact and positive activity. Remember, we are commanded to love our neighbors first.

Here are some examples of what a "Secret Men's Club" or neighborhood-focused men's ministry event could look like for you.

1. Free Neighborhood Car Wash - Find a man to host at their home. Create a flyer he can share with households around him. Men ministry members come with buckets and materials to wash cars on the host's driveway. While folks get their car washed, the host gets to build relationships with his neighbors for a follow-up!
2. Neighborhood Service Project - Men's ministry member finds a home in his neighborhood that would benefit from a service project. Men come with materials to complete that project help and then enjoy some refreshments and visiting. The host has an opportunity to build a further relationship with the family that is helped.
3. Donuts on the Driveway or Goodies in the Garage - Men's ministry members offer their driveway or garage, spread fliers among neighbors ahead of the event, and men's ministry provides some men to help with setup and to bring food. No telling where conversation with neighbors could lead!
4. Wing Fest, BBQ Fest or fish fry- Men's ministry member hosts at his house or yard and neighbor men are invited to bring their best wings or BBQ for a neighborhood contest. Or maybe bring fish for  good old-fashioned fish fry. Men's ministry can provide some resources and men who come with food for the fellowship!
5. Ice Cream Social - Similar to the Wing Fest but this is all about ice cream. Make your own and be judged for status as best in the neighborhood or bring some store-bought and enjoy the conversation.
6. Driveway Cookout - Your host moves his grill and the men's ministry provides hot dogs and condiments for a neighborhood cookout! Invite your neighbors and make new friends. It is also fun to have some activities that help neighbors get to know each other.
7. Ping-Pong Tournament - Break out the table and invite your neighbors for a friendly round-robin tournament. If you do not play ping ping, bring a lawn chair and watch and enjoy some refreshments! A men's ministry member hosts this event and other men come to play and help with refreshments.
8. Free Coffee or Free Sodas - I read recently about a men's group that simply gathered at a busy neighborhood intersection handing out free coffee and soda. They also visited with people who came by. It ended up becoming a monthly tradition. The goal was learn the names of neighbors.
9. Driveway Corn-Hole Tournament - Same principles as these other ideas, and use whatever game you would like. There is just something about a competition that brings men out. But it doesn't happen on its own. Your neighborhood host has to spread the word, hand out fliers and make some calls for this to be a success. Maybe even put up a yard sign the week before announcing the event.
10. Or try kicking off a regular Secret Men's Club - use this first event as a way to kick off a regular monthly men's gathering in your neighborhood. The long-term goal could even be a neighborhood life group born out of these gatherings.

One of the keys to success is that the Men's Ministry needs a team member embedded in each neighborhood who will pass out fliers or announce the event to their neighbors and neighborhood. For early and long-term success, an effort like this has to have a local connection. Having people simply swing in from another part of town and do a one-time event and leave does not have a long-term impact. But that man who stays behind because he lives there can really be supported with one of these local relationship-building efforts.

The men's ministry team or leaders then need to coordinate which men go to which event to help. Depending on the size of the group it could be possible to do several neighborhood events at the same time. There could be the issue of budget for supplies, materials, etc., but by having a man host an individual site you have a built-in volunteer network.

If you have other thoughts and ideas I am always glad to hear them. Reach out to me by email at burtond@missouri.edu