Your Town Won’t Get Better Just Because You Complained About It

I saw a social media post recently that made me stop and think: “Your small town isn’t going to improve because you complained about it in a Facebook group filled with 6,000 other people who also refuse to get involved.”

Ouch. There is a little truth in that statement, isn’t there?

We complain about the lack of things to do. We complain that downtown is struggling, that community events are poorly attended, that nobody seems to care anymore, and that our neighbors keep to themselves. We lament that our town isn’t what it used to be.

We scroll through Facebook, add our own commentary, and perhaps feel a little better because we have found other people who share our frustrations.

But what if the problem isn’t just that our communities have shortcomings? What if part of the problem is that we have forgotten our own responsibility for making them better?

It’s easy to identify what is wrong with a community. It’s harder to take responsibility for improving it.

We want a vibrant downtown, but do we shop at local businesses? We want community events, but do we volunteer? We want welcoming neighborhoods, but have we introduced ourselves to the people who live next door?

From complaints to contribution

I don’t want to suggest that every complaint is unjustified or that people should stop pointing out real problems. Constructive criticism is important. Sometimes speaking up is the first step toward change.

But there is a difference between criticizing a community and contributing to it.

Criticism asks, “Why doesn’t somebody do something about this?”

Contribution asks, “What can I do?”

Criticism identifies the absence of community spirit. Contribution demonstrates it.

Criticism can gather thousands of people around a shared frustration. Contribution can bring a handful of neighbors together around a shared purpose.

And sometimes, those few neighbors can start something much bigger.

Imagine if the 6,000 people in that Facebook group each reached out to just two neighbors. Imagine if a fraction of them organized a small gathering, volunteered for a local project, supported a struggling business, or welcomed newcomers.

The group could become more than a place to complain. It could become a source of community action.

The same technology that allows us to gather around our frustrations can help us organize around our hopes.

The question is whether we are willing to move from talking about community to participating in it.

What if we became the people we wish lived here?

Here’s a question worth asking the next time we complain about our town: Am I helping create the kind of community I wish I lived in?

If you want a friendlier town, be friendlier. If you want a more connected neighborhood, start connecting. If you want people to participate in community life, participate yourself.

You may not be able to fix every problem. You may not have the time or resources to tackle the biggest challenges facing your community.

But you can learn a name. You can extend an invitation. You can lend a hand. You can show up.

And you can stop assuming that someone else is responsible for making your community a better place to live.

The future of our towns will depend partly on decisions made in boardrooms, city halls, and public meetings. But it will also depend on what happens on our front porches, in our driveways, at our local businesses, and in the ordinary encounters between people who live near one another.

A better community doesn’t require everyone to do everything.

It requires more of us to do something.

So the next time you feel the urge to complain about your town, go ahead and identify the problem. Then ask yourself one more question:

What is one thing I can do this week to make my little corner of this community a better place to live?

Learn a name. Make an introduction. Invite someone over. Join a group. Help with a local project.

And if you need a place to start, join us in celebrating Missouri Good Neighbor Week.

Let’s spend a little less time complaining about the communities we have and a little more time building the communities we want.

After all, we don’t just live in our communities.

We help make them what they are.

WRITTEN BY

David L. Burton

For more information, visit the Engaged Neighbor website. Take our pledge and become part of a movement! Or subscribe to our newsletter. Access some of the research documents written by David Burton, the author of this blog. Or better yet, purchase one of his books off Amazon. Contact David L. Burton via email at dburton541@yahoo.